A Final Entry...

Last night when I was praying, I cried out to God. I told Him a lot of things, and asked Him a lot of things, and then, I asked Him if there was anything that HE was concerned about. He answered me, and brought to my mind this thing right here...livejournal.
A couple of weeks ago, I felt Him nudge my heart and tell me that I needed to stop coming on here, but I didn't want to listen because I feel so much better after writing in here. So I didn't listen.
But now, I'm listening because if God tells you something twice, it's got to be VERY important. It's not easy, because this has become an addiction to me, and I feel like there is a demonic influence here. But that's not the only thing that I felt God lay on my heart. There's something else that I felt led to do, and that is to address two specific people. First of all, Seth.

Seth, I really hope that you know how much I love you. I hope that I have showed you how important you are to me, and if I haven't, then I am really sorry. I know that a lot of things changed after Sarah and I decided that we needed a break from going out to eat with you all, for our spiritual and physical good. But it didn't mean that we didn't love you guys anymore, and I REALLY hope that you know that. In fact, it was kind of sad to me to find out that that is what our relationship had been based on.
Seth, my heart has been broken for you the last couple of months. I have literally cried to God for you. To see how opposite you are on here compared to the person I know at church, hurts so bad. I hope that you don't think I'm putting you down, because it's not intended to be taken that way. I just know that the plans that God has for you are great, but they'll only happen if you are following Him with your whole heart. I pray for you a lot Seth, and I will continue to do that. God isn't a game, and I have a feeling that He mourns when He's treated like one. Please Seth, watch out.

Second of all...Kryssi.
Kryssi, I hope that you also know that I love you SO much. There have been times lately when I wish that I could take back that letter that I sent you. Not because I think that there's anything wrong in it, but because it looks like it didn't do any good. I have been trying to talk to you more when I see you, and just trying to let you know that I still care, and after the last conversation we had about your hair, I was told that you thought the conversation was "fake". I'm really sorry that you feel that way. I was just trying to make conversation, and let you know that I'm okay with you.
You already know that I'm worried about you. And I have a feeling that you don't really care what I think, but PLEASE care about what God thinks. I'm not saying that God told me what He's thinking about, but it makes it very clear in His Word, what He thinks about the decisions you are making. He loves you SO much, but you are making a choice, and whatever choices you make, good or bad, you will reap from those choices. Just remember that.
I miss YOU...the real YOU. The person who wanted to please God, and be more like Him...the person who wanted to be held accountable in the relationships that she made, and the person who was a real friend to anybody that needed one. I miss her, and I know that she's in there, but I think that Satan has blinded her eyes.

I hope that you both aren't mad at me. I am going to continue treating you guys the same way, if not even better when I see you. And I've decided that I'm not even going to look to see if you guys write about this in your journals, because I don't need to be hurt, and I don't need to hold any bitterness toward you. I just pray that you will take time and ask God if He is concerned about anything, and if you don't, well you probably know the answer already.

Now I'm going to talk to you Satan. You have blinded the minds of millions of people, and I know that you are thrilled by that. But by the BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST, I command you to release your hold on them! You have come to kill, steal, and destroy, and in the name of JESUS CHRIST, I command you to be GONE!!! Release your hold!

Jesus, please take over our lives, and mold and make us into what you want us to be. Lord, I love you more than I could ever say in words, and I care about my friends. Please show them what you want them to do, and let them listen to your voice. Please touch every person who reads or writes any journal entries in this livejournal because they need you.
You are the KING of all KINGS and the LORD of all LORDS!

-If you guys want to say that I'm "judging" or anything else like that, I'm really sorry you feel that way. As your friend I am obligated to tell you this, because your choice could make the decision of where you will spend eternity.
Please make the right choice, and don't give in to the World.
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    worried worried
Good Memories

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I had an awesome talk with God last night. I took time to not only talk to Him, but to listen too. It's amazing how you feel when you just take time to tell Him all the things that you feel. I even had tears, and it felt so good.
Right now, I'm eating pizza that dad brought home last night after his meeting. It's really good! I love food!!! Heehee.
Man, we are having a lot of company this month! Now my uncle and aunt are spending the night here on Wed. night, cuz my aunts dad is going to be in the hospital down here to have his pace maker fixed. I'm not sure if it's just my uncle spending the night, or both of them. It just depends on how things go down at the hospital. Then on Saturday, the 2 girls from Azusa Pacific will be here, then Dee in a couple of weeks. It's gonna be busy around here, but fun too!
I hurt my leg last night. I don't know if I busted a vein or what, but I'm just trying to be extra careful today.
I can't wait till Wednesday night. I have learned SO much from this week's lesson. The series that we're doing is GREAT!!!
Well folks, ta ta for now.
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    Be Near Oh God
PK Camp

(no subject)

Today has been confusing...I've already shed some tears, but I'm doing a lot better now. There's just been a lot of things hit me the last couple of months, and sometimes, it's easy to just get overwhelmed. But like I said, I'm doing much better now.
Yesterday was an AWESOME day. Dad went on in his Timothy series, and talked about the verse that talks about knowing some people's sins, but other people's sins being hidden. Sometimes, people think that nobody else knows about their hidden sins, or they put on a face when their around other Christians, but then when there alone, or with another type of group, they are a totally different person. There was an example given of David and Bathsheba, and how David tried to hide his sin, but it soon got out, because he had not confessed his sin to God. It was a very good sermon, and I think that a lot of people looked at their lives and thought about it, because there were a lot of people who came down for the altar call. It was AWESOME!!! It's always good to see people's lives changed when they come to Jesus. And it will ALWAYS be changed. That is so refreshing.
Okay, I admit...Sarah and I are completely crazy when it comes to chinese food. We had it again on Sunday. Kurie didn't really want it, so Sarah told her that we could just take her home, but she wanted to go. So we had chinese, and she had pretty much a non-chinese lunch at a chinese resteraunt. My lunch was SO YUMMY!!! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
It was SO nice to be able to visit with Kurie again though. And her plate still looked yummy. They are adding more american food at the buffet. I think that I stuffed myself to death though. When I got home, I put some shorts on, and they hardly even fit...ooops:)
Sunday night was really good too. There was an awesome spirit of thankfulness and joy. It was really neat. I am so thankful for my relationship with Jesus. Everyday, I strive to be more like Him, and I am now working on having more "tent meetings with him." We're going to talk about that on Wednesday. It's gonna be awesome! In everything that I do, I want to be like Jesus, and I want others to see Him in me. That is VERY important to me. I am so thankful for the sacrifice that He made for me, and the least that I can do, is give Him everything that I have. I love Him SO much.
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    Zoe Girl

(no subject)

I got my class ring back today, and it actually fits this time. YAY!!! I'm really glad that I sent it back this last time, cuz it looks really good on my right hand. And this way, I can still wear my promise ring on my left hand.
I haven't really been in the mood to update a whole lot lately. So I can't remember where I left off. Ummm...I think I wrote about getting to see my cousin Michelle tomorrow. That will be lots of fun!
Sarah and I got our pictures back today, so mom and I stopped by her work and showed her and Christy. Then, Sarah took us in the back, and we got a cookie. Yummy!
I think we're going out to eat tonight. I'm not sure when though. Some time this week, I've gotta dust my room for when the girls come from Azusa Pacific. And then it will be nice and clean for when Dee comes too.
Today, Nina told me that her daughter Robin thought I was 21! She said that she really enjoyed worship on Sunday. Her compliment made me feel good. Especially since, there was another guy on Wednesday that complimented me about worship time too. I just give all of the glory to God. I am thankful that He has used me so much in my life. It blesses me to be able to work for Him.
Newayz...see y'all latah.
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    happy happy

(no subject)

* Remember that your presence is a present to the world.

* Remember that you are a unique and unrepeatable creation.

* Remember that your life can be what you want it to be.

* Remember to take the days just one at a time.

* Remember to count your blessings, not your troubles.

* Remember that you'll make it through whatever comes along.

* Remember that most of the answers you need are within you.

* Remember those dreams waiting to be realized.

* Remember that decisions are too important to leave to chance.

* Remember to always reach for the best that is within you.

* Remember that nothing wastes more energy than worry

* Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

* Remember that the longer you carry a grudge, the heavier it gets.

* Remember not to take things too seriously.

* Remember to laugh.

* Remember that a little love goes a long way.

* Remember that a lot goes forever.

* Remember that happiness is more often found in giving than getting.

* Remember that life's treasures are people, not things.

Author Unknown
Good Memories

(no subject)

Seriously...I never knew that I could laugh through "A walk to remember" so much. Usually when I watch it, I'm almost cryin, but not Monday. Of course, when I hang out with Candace, it's a lot easier to laugh at the saddest things. Oh my!
Newayz...Monday went good. We watched like I said..."A Walk To Remember", then we played UNO and SORRY. It was so fun. We had the whole british accent going SO Well! It was GREAT!!! Then before they left, we all got some anointing oil, and prayed over our whole house because of a couple of reasons. But ya, it was awesome.
Janna Long concerts getting closer!!!
I'm gonna finish up my lesson for tonight when I finish this. I am just really excited about it. I get to see my cousin Michelle who lives in Tennessee on Saturday. I haven't seen her in a long time. Then on the week of 4th of July, I get to go to San Diego for a family reunion. I am VERY excited about that. I get to see all of my cousins on the Dennie side(I'm not sure about 1, but she might be coming down with her husband), and I get to see a lot of people that I've never met, and some that I've only met once. It's gonna be GREAT!!! Plus, I probably get to go to the BEACH!!!!!!!!(My favorite Place on Earth)

I can't wait till tonight. I'm really excited. Well, gotta go.
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    Anything good
PK Camp

Different subjects...

Yesterday was Great! Again, there was an awesome spirit in church. God is just SO WONDERFUL!!!
For lunch, Sarah and I went to lunch at the Islands with Candace, Caleb, and Ashley. It was SO much fun!!! We were cracking up laughing most of the time. It was GREAT!
In about half an hour, all of the Rutledges are coming over for a BBQ. Dad's makin homemade banana icecream! My stomach is jumping up and down with excitement!
The Janna Long concert is next week! I am so excited. I can't wait to see Brooke and Melissa there!
I know this is a little late, but I forgot to write about it last time...Ruben won American Idol. I really wanted Clay to win, cuz he was just...the best, but Ruben had a REALLY good voice too. At least all of the top 3 were awesome singers. So there really was no way that anybody bad could win. I'm glad that the military guy didn't win though, cuz the only reason that he would have won, was cuz of that exact thing...he's in the military.
What's with Smallville? He blew up the ship!!!???? AAAHHHHH!
That's all I have to say about that...but I can't wait till next season.
I missed the Everwood finale, cuz I was watchin Idol, but dad recorded it, so I'll see it in about 4 months...Very Inside Joke.
Well, that's it for right now in the life of me. Later.
Oh, tonight we're gonna guessed it...A Walk to Remember, cuz ya...Candace hasn't seen it.
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    Holy Spirit Rain Down
PK Camp

A Great Night...

I had such a GREAT night last night. I got to talk to Gabby on instant messenger, and I have to tell you...She is a Godsend. I feel like God has brought our friendship so much closer, just when I needed it most. We share a lot of the same standards, We are both the same heighth (which we were talking about, cuz we think it intimidates a lot of guys...that and our high standards), we both have gone through a lot of the same things, since she's an MK and I'm a PK, and she has been such an encouragement to me. I am so happy for her, cuz Trevor asked her out a couple of weeks ago, and she is one of the SWEETEST people I know. We just had a very good LONG talk. It was very refreshing. I just thank God for the new friendships that he is giving me. Gabby, Whitney, Marla, Trevor, and Cameron. They are all gifts from God to me. Thank you Jesus! And even though I don't think that you can only have a friendship if you have everything in common, the best part of these friendships, is that they all love Jesus with their WHOLE hearts!
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    The Song that Gabby was Talking about...
Good Memories

An Awesome Week...

This has been an AWESOME week! Wednesday was great! In youth, we talked about when obstacles come into our lives, and how to keep our focus on God. Even though there weren't very many youth, cuz of some concerts and stuff going on, it really was awesome. We also got to talk about some ideas for reaching youth, and it was just really good.
Today, I've been working on the lesson for next week, and I am REALLY excited about it. I'm starting a series called, Know Him, Serve Him, and I have learned so much, just from getting the lesson ready. I am believing that God is going to do great things in our lives, and I am looking forward to the miracles that He is going to do. I am just really refreshed by God's Word today.
I can't believe that it's already graduation time. I'm so glad that I have one more year before I graduate. I'm just really enjoying where I'm at, but am also thankful that I am growing and maturing in not only my walk with God, but also just in my life. The trials that I have gone through lately, have really helped me just to keep my focus on God.
Newayz, I got my pictures back yesterday, and they turned out GREAT!!! I'm really excited about them. Well, I think I'll stop here.
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    With You...